


The violinist's tears

by Koguma02



Category: Cookie Run (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, I don't know what I'm supposed to tag, I'm new here, M/M, Self-Esteem Issues, Swearing, mention of drugs, mention of self-harm, mention of suicide, oh yeh right, that last one is super slight though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:48:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 16,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25262605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Koguma02/pseuds/Koguma02
Summary: A first tour is supposed to be a good thing for a musician, right ? But Mint Choco certainly didn't expect such experience from his...
Relationships: Mint Choco Cookie/Rockstar Cookie (Cookie Run)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 17





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone ! This is a repost of something I already posted on tumblr (just trying to put my work for the most amount of people out there). Just your average Mintrock, although with lots of headcanons. Settle in, 'cause it's a long one !

As a child, Mint Choco had often heard at school and read in books that no two places in the world are alike. Every destination is unique, filled with local wonders that could not be seen anywhere else. But to him who had been travelling for as long as he could remember, this statement seemed false. Every place looked the same.

Or at least so did every auditiorium’s backstage. These places were all built in such a way that he could almost navigate entirely by himself in a new, unknown one with little to no troubles. They were always the same. Long, often crowded corridors, big practice rooms for groups and ballet dancers alongside the tinier VIP rooms reserved for famous artists, without forgetting all of the dressing rooms and large closets where quantities of supply were kept for every occasion, should it be clothes, make-up, or technical equipments. With all the tours he had gone on as a teenager, he definitely felt like he could affirm that every concert place had that same set-up. If the positioning of these elements in the building was to excepted, he could confidently say that he knew every backstage in the country, maybe even in the entire world.  
But this was his first time actually exploring one of these VIP rooms, as _he_ was the famous artist that was awaited to be seen on stage now. Not just a trainee part of a music troup anymore.

Although… This wasn’t exactly true. It wasn’t his first time in a VIP room.  
It was his ninth.

His very first tour as an individual, renommed musician was coming to an end. And after having gone around half of the country, Mint Choco had to give a very last recital in the city where he actually lived. A coincidentally proper end to that one month long adventure.

The young man bent over the small desk, putting his hands on it as he looked into the mirror. His hair was perfectly done in that signature hairstyle he enjoyed wearing thanks to the tour’s hairdresser. His face had been slightly lightened up and powdered in order to catch the stage’s spotlights in the most favorable way. His formal costume was clean, neatened up from any last speck of dust and had been carefully ironed during that very afternoon to make sure it was spotless. He was ready for his final concert.

He looked like a mess.

All of the team’s efforts weren’t enough to prevent him from detecting the dark bags which had only grown bigger under his eyes as the tour had gone on. Not only that but the parts of his skin that weren’t covered with make-up were also paler than usual.

It was crazy how much one month could change a man.

Mint Choco straigtened back up and turned back to the other side of the room. He couldn’t think about how tired and worn out he was feeling right now. He had a perfect performance to give in about half an hour. He had to get ready.

His enormous luggage and personnal backpack lied against the opposite wall. And resting on top of the biggest bag was the checkered, mint colored violin case which contained that instrument he cherished so much. An instrument that… He would have rather liked to put down for a few days, actually.  
But an instrument that needed to get properly tuned.

He silently opened the case, carefully grabbing his signature mint green violin and stuck it between his chin and his shoulder. Having been so intensely used over the last weeks, the instrument almost had no time to get detuned but it was a fragile object. The slightest change in temperature, humidity or even just a somewhat harsh transportation were enough to screw the strings’ harmony up. Thus did he carefully, almost religiously tuned his instrument before any and every concert. It was part of his ritual.

A ritual that usually calmed him down a bit.

He had never really been subjected to performance anxiety. His young years were in an ensemble where the weight was shared alongside everyone and he had anyway always worked to keep his composure in stressful situations. Or… At least did he try.

He had felt it creeping in, a little more every day as they had gone further and further into his tour. The anxiety. The stress. The fear of messing it all, in front of a large crowd. Losing his admirators, losing his job. Losing everyone that looked up to him.

He had never let fame get to his head despite his rapidly rising popularity. He was here for the music, not for the praise. Every bit of applaude made him feel accomplished, of course, but he could also very well practice alone in that tiny room. It would feel the same to him.  
It would even maybe be a bit nicer, right now.

With the last concert right around the corner, there was no way he could deny his tiredness. Even more, there was something he would have never expected… He could feel that he wanted to be alone. Away from all of these people. The eight first concerts plus the constant presence of his preparation team, his manager… This was too much.  
Yet this was so little at the same time, because the discussion were always the same. The next performance, the transport matters, the food budget, the constant training.  
It was always « are you able to play it ? ». Never just « how are you ? ».  
It felt so… Empty.

He realized as he was finishing to tune in his violin that he didn’t exactly want to be alone. He wanted to be around people. But around the kind of people that saw him for who he was, not for what he was. The people that saw him as the sweet Mint Choco, not as the genius violinist.

He sighed as he carefully put his violin back into its case. He needed to chase these thoughts away. This was the hard reality of the stage, yes, but… This was his dream, right ? After all, when he was actually playing, he almost felt at peace. His compositions were his pride, his melodies his true joy. He loved playing them.  
Just… Not like that. Not being constantly forced. Always under pressure. Steadily expected to be perfect.

As he picked his bow to rise its hair’s tension, he realized that his hands were shaking. It had never happened before a performance.  
It was bad.  
He needed to get a hold on himself, at last.

He was in the middle of spreading rosin onto the hair when a knock came from the door. Another one of his manager unwanted visits.

« Come in. » He said in a monotone voice.

He didn’t even bother to turn around when the door opened, keeping busy on his instrument.

« It’s been a while, hasn’t it, Minty ? »

His heart skipped a beat when he heard that voice, so much so that he almost dropped his bow to the ground. He had to firmly control his shaky hand to put it back in the case as he heard a few steps behind him. He turned around in one nimble motion and only had to take one step before finding himself in the newcomer’s arms. He immediately tightened his grip around the man, plunging his head into that fluffy mass of hair he knew so well. The two of them stayed still for a moment, as Mint Choco was taking long but quiet huffs of that familiar smell. Finally stepping back, they couldn’t actually dare to let go of each other’s hands. The musician finally laid his eyes on the stranger.

But a stranger it was not. The beautiful, excentric man that just entered his room without being properly announced was none other than his boyfriend, Rockstar. His lover, who he hadn’t gotten a true occasion to see for the last thirty days.

« One month without you is too long. » The man said with a smile.

Mint Choco’s worries immediately disappeared at that sight, without him even realizing it. He was too focused on his joyful expression.  
Rockstar was true. It had been too long.

« Starlight… » He only managed to answered, almost muttering as a smile grew on his own face as well.

This single nickname was enough to make his boyfriend’s smile bigger and brighter.

« I can’t believe I’m finally seeing you again ! The young prodigy, the majestuous maestro, Mint Choco ! » Rockstar merrily announced as he suddenly lifted him off of the ground.

The violinist let a small exclamation of surprise out as his lover spun him around before gently putting him back on the ground. He went back for a hug as soon as his feet touched the floor again. He wanted to make up for the time they had passed away from each other during the tour.

« You’re lighter than before. »

The tone of Rockstar’s voice however immediately pulled him out of his lovey-dovey wills. The young musician lifted his head again, stepping back to catch a glance at his lover’s whole face. The energy had been sapped away from his grey eyes and his smirk was almost turned upside down. He was worried, as he unfortunately expected.

« What happened ? Have they been feeding you enough ? » He immediately asked, his hands well onto his boyfriend’s side. « Don’t tell me that fucking producer tried to cut down the cost by downgrading your meals. »

Mint Choco cracked a smile at his reckless attitude. He had really missed that.  
But for now, he needed to reassure him before anything else.

« No, the meals were all alright… Even very good ! I’ve just… »

His own smirk disappeared as he realized what Rockstar had actually told him.  
That tour had taken a bigger toll on his body than what he had expected.

« I… I have been a bit stressed lately. And you know how stress upsets the stomach and all of that jiggery-pokery. »

He ended his sentence on another smile but it wasn’t enough to make his boyfriend stop frowning.

« Are you okay, Mint Choco ? »

That single sentence, the one he had wished to hear for the whole previous month, was asked with the most serious tone and it was almost enough to bring tears to his eyes. All of his worries suddenly came back to him. His head suddenly felt heavy. His mind became crowded with so many intrusive thoughts and awful feelings in less than a second. He couldn’t help but lower his head and look at the ground.

« Mint ! »

Rockstar moved his hand to grab his chin, something he had the strong tendency to do, but Mint Choco actually lifted it back before he could do anything. He did his best to wear a true, sincere smile.

« I’m alright, Rocky. Just running a bit of that tour’s weariness. But I’m doing alright. »

The guitarist plunged his eyes into his. The sight of worries plaguing his grey pupils made Mint Choco’s heart sink. Another bad feeling to add to the pile.  
But the tour wasn’t done yet. He had to keep his attitude up. He had to be perfect.

And finally, Rockstar smiled again.

« You’re the bravest. A performance every three days, I’m not sure if I could keep up with such a rhythm. » He said, fixing one of his lover’s misplaced hair strands.

« Oh, it’s doable. It only take… »

His sentence was cut short by a loud bang on the room’s door.

« Up on the stage in ten minutes !! »

The artist immediately recognized his manager’s voice.  
Being both musicians, the two lovers knew this was time to part and that nothing could change it. They finally let go of each other.

« Well, you’ll tell me later. » Rockstar said, not resisting the temptation to take one of Mint Choco’s hand and gently rub it with his thumb.

The violinist smiled, hiding the stress that was adding up by the second behind his cheerful expression. He got nearer for the first and last kiss they had shared today, trying his best to let his worries melt away at the contact of his lover’s lips. The guitarist dropped his hand as they pulled out and turned back toward the door.

« I took a seat in the fourth row, in the middle. » He announced with another of his usual smirks. « The lover’s place. »

Mint Choco kept his smile at these words. Rockstar would maybe be able to stare at him all he wanted but he couln’t do the same. When his eyes weren’t brushing over his music sheets, he had to keep his composure and look at the public. Not at a random messy haired man in the very first row.  
That specific seat allowed the violinist to give out the impression of looking at the audience as a whole when in fact, he would mostly be searching for one of his boyfriend’s beloved smiles.

« Waiting to see your superb performance, prodigy boy. And knowing you, I know it will be perfect. »

The musician’s face froze up as his entire body suddenly filled up with anguish. And it was not of the small kind.

It was a paralyzing anxiety. The one that gave the impression that his whole being was filled with all of the worst feelings he had ever lived through, crushing all of his attempts to think and breah properly.

Rockstar too. Rockstar too only waited to see his performance. Nothing else.  
Rockstar too wanted to see the violinist. Not Mint Choco.

He would have expected tears to flow down his cheeks at this point but nothing soothed the burning ache of his face. He watched motionlessly as Rockstar’s expression went from his usual confidence to full of worries. His own body wasn’t answering to his brain.

He could only feel guilt. Fear. Anxiety.  
He was no one. Barely anything.  
Just a thing for everyone’s entertainment.

And on top of that, he was worrying his boyfriend now. He was awful.

« Minty ! What’s going on ?! Mint Choco !! »

The guitarist immediately jumped back in front of him, grabbing both of his arms. The violinist’s sight didn’t budge, endlessly glancing at one specific spot on his boyfriend’s chin.

« Mint Choco !! Answer me !! »

The worried, so unusual tone that came to his ears suddenly snapped him back to reality. He felt just enough will power to lift his head. Meet Rockstar’s eyes.  
And cry.

« I… I… I c… »

But no word made it out of his throat.

The man immediately pulled him into a hug.

« My darling, my poor thing. I knew something was not right !! » He exclaimed as he gently caressed his lover’s back and hair. « What did that fucking tour do to you… What did they do to you… »

The tour. It was not finished. He had to finish it.  
He was so close to the end. He couldn’t let it at that.

« I… I… »

But his throat was so closed up. It was so hard to speak.

« I… Need to… Play. »

His voice came out as a whimper more than anything else. He felt Rockstar lift and shake his head.

« No no no no ! You’re not doing it ! You’re coming back home, right now, with me ! The tour is over !

-It… Is not. People are counting on me. They are… Counting on me. »

He felt the comforting warmth of his lover fade away as the guitarist stepped back. His face was more plagued with worries than before. He felt so guilty for it.

« Okay. You’re playing tonight. They are counting on you. » Rockstar said with an almost anger filled tone. « But I’m counting on you to make it out alive ! »

He had suddenly raised his voice and immediately regretted it. Not that Mint Choco really felt bad about it anyway.  
He was already such a mistake after all.

« I want you to make it out alive and well, alright ? » He asked again in a calmer voice.

The violinist felt a hand on his cheek. It felt…

He was so confused. He felt awful but it felt good. He… Deserved it.  
He had missed it so much. He didn’t know what was going on anymore.

« Do your best. I’ll be cheering you on from the lover’s seat. » Rockstar continued, gently caressing his face. « Then I’ll be coming to get you here, we’ll get home and talk about that whole thing, alright dear ? »

Mint Choco finally found the energy to move. He weakly nodded.

Rockstar pulled him closer one last time, placing a soft kiss onto his forehead. Mint Choco did his best to enjoy it wholy.

« Whatever happens, I’ll love you anyway. So have fun, alright ? Music is about having fun, remember ? »

The violinist nodded again. It felt like an eternity, yet such a short moment. When the guitarist took his hand away, he suddenly felt cold.

« You call me Starlight, but really, you are the one lighting up my life. Don’t you dare forget it. » Rockstar said as he was opening the door to get out.

« Yes… Starlight. »

Mint Choco didn’t really see if his boyfriend smiled to that or not. Maybe he did. It was endearing after all. Or maybe not. Because of how awful he was.

He turned back to his violin case and grabbed his instrument. His sight passed over the mirror without really seeing his reflection. He was such a mess after all.

But it was time for his performance now.


	2. Chapter 2

Backstages. Rockstar had seen a handful of those.   
Although probably not as much as his boyfriend did and certainly not in the same way. Unlike the genius violinist, the guitarist’s career as a musician was only just beginning. He had played his own songs at a handful of small concerts and was currently working on recording his first true album but he had yet to be invited to perform in such a big structure. He only saw prestigious backstages like those when accompanying his many artist friends and, of course, when visiting his boyfriend.  
A boyfriend that was mildly worrying him at the moment.

He had met Mint Choco before he could even play his guitar properly. He had seen his lovely maestro change over time from a charming young boy to a handsome teen before becoming what he was now. A dapper violinist. A majestic artist.  
And his attitude had changed alongside his appearance. His bubbly manners had soothed down over the years, becoming more refined and graceful. It felt strange for him who had been raised in a working class family, but his once friend lived in a rich neighborhood after all. Both of his parents had high hopes for his future. Violin was, to their eyes, a simple hobby for their son.  
But it wasn’t Mint Choco’s mindset. He wanted to earn a living out of his passion. And against his parent’s wills, the young man had decided to become a profesionnal musician.

He was quickly thrown out of his home. Rockstar wasn’t there for him at that time because of his own family issues but he dearly wished that it had been otherwise. These few months where Mint Choco lived on the street had deeply changed him.

He was way warier. Always on the look out. His formal manners had not disappeared but his self worth did, replaced instead by a whole lot of stress. He never lost these cautious ways, even when he was finally able to find a proper home thanks to his old professor.  
At that time, Rockstar had finally settled his life down, making money left and right to manage to stay afloat. It was then that he had stumbled upon his childhood friend again.

Mint Choco looked the same as he ever did, just more handsome and classier. The guitarist had instantly fallen in love at that moment. But despite his feelings, something felt wrong.  
The violinist didn’t smile the same way anymore.

Upon becoming closer to him again, Rockstar finally managed to see his true smile again. The smile of a child whose dreams were still real. The smile of someone who truly enjoyed himself. He had learnt with time that the other smile was for the concerts. The mandatory performances.  
His manners didn’t change that much between the stage and his private life but his intentions sure did. The guitarist was glad to be able to see that second side.

In the end, he knew that Mint Choco was happy. Just very cautious. He wished that this would not be the case but he couldn’t change the past. Furthermore, his boyfriend truly enjoyed himself when he composed and played. The stress was only reserved for some times before the stage.

But it had never hit him that hardly.

Rockstar could still fill the chills going down his spine when picturing the moment his lover’s whole body had suddenly frozen up. The few parts of his face that were not covered in make-up had totally drained out of colors. And when he had laid a kiss on his forehead, he had realized that the violinist was running a fever.  
What the hell could have happened during that tour ? They had stayed in contact over the phone during the last month, of course but… He had no clue all of this time that his boyfriend could have been feeling so bad, to the point where he had broken down right in his arms ! To the point where he had made himself sick !

He was definitely going to have a talk with that damn manager of his.

But his ongoing priority wasn’t there. That greedy man had at least been able to get him a single free ticket to Mint Choco’s concert. And Rockstar had no will to see his boyfriend collapse in front of hundreds of people, in his own city.  
He was going to support the shit out of him, should he need to be more obnoxious than he had ever been.

The auditorium was already filled to its maximum capacity when Rockstar finally found his way to the audience’s side. No one wanted to miss the local genius musician after all.

The lights weren’t turned off yet though and as he was walking up the rows of seats to reach his own, he felt several glares getting laid on him. This was to be expected.  
Mint Choco may be a brand new star but he already was a high class one. The tickets for his first tour had sold for high prices, rendering it almost impossible to attend for the average family. The vast majority of the audience was composed of middle aged to old persons who dressed in a fancier way than he would ever. There was no wonder why he was considered as the odd one out, with his younger traits, slight make-up, long messy hair and dark earrings.  
Although it wasn’t like he cared about that kind of thing anyway. He had spent all of his childhood hiding in the shadows. He could enjoy some light’s shine, now.

Arriving at the fourth row, he made his way to the middle, unfortunately bothering numerous edlers. Some of them gladly let him pass over their legs but others gave him some harsh death glare. He finally settled down at his place –the lover’s seat–, being careful not to annoy the lovely old lady on his right. Taking off his black leather jacket, he caught the woman on his other side leaning over to her husband, whispering something in his ears while throwing some strange glances at him. He sighed as he placed his vest behind him. He could imagine her words without even hearing them.  
Someone with such an innaceptable rig-out should not be allowed in such a fancy event. Sinning ears like his would not be fit to understand the complexity of classical music.

Unfortunately, this kind of sour people still existed in that modern, progressive society and many of them seemed to have gathered to that concert. Mint Choco was certainly unfortunate to have such a kind of audience. Rockstar would adore to call bullshit on that woman’s thoughts, if it were for the fact it would hurt her chaste ears.   
It was true that classical was not Rockstar’s favorite genre and that he could not possibly fathom the whole other variety of sounds that his boyfriend could create with his sole violin, let alone how to use them. But this did not prevent him, or any other for that matter, to enjoy his lover’s piece.  
An activity which he was going to have right now. And no grumpy old lady could spoil his fun.

He was around that point in his reflexions when the lights turned off. Five hundreds people went silent within the bat of an eye and everyone’s attention turned to the stage.

The spotlights lit up, illuminating a fancy and heavy red curtain as it slowly retreated toward the ceiling.

And there appeared the virtuoso of a violinist, Mint Choco.  
The literal light of his nights.

The musician was standing perfectly straight, violin in his left hand, bow in the other. A golden, finely decorated music stand was holding a few of his music sheets on his right. In front of him was a single microphone on top of its stand.  
He gently deposited his bow on the music stand and reached forward to grab the microphone. All of that in one, continuous movement. No stuttering to be seen, just a lovely but shy smile and a grace that could make even the finest of princes ashamed.

But during all of that, he had not opened his eyes at all.

It was only when he opened his mouth that he’d finally let himself see.

« Ladies and Gentlemen, I thank you for coming to see me tonight. I will this evening perform all of my newest compositions, intersped by some well known Mozart’s and Strauss’ pieces. I sincerely hope that you will enjoy the sound of my violin. Please allow yourself to relax to my music, as I shall invite each of you into my symphony. »

Applauses started coming before he even finished talking. Mint Choco placed the microphone back on its stand and backed away to his original place while a technician took the object away, leaving only the musician and his music sheets on the stage.

Even for someone who enjoyed listening to music at high volume despite his boyfriend’s recommendations, Rockstar was stunned by the intensity of this round of applause. He was of course taking part in it as well but his lover’s ability to raise the crowd’s love was outstanding.  
People really did love perfect mannerism, didn’t they ? It was something that was rarely seen anymore these days and this throwback to that former era seemed like a treat to more than one.

But this was a lot. Really quite a lot. The guitarist couldn’t help but think about what had happened a mere ten minutes earlier. His lovely violinist in his most fragile moment, almost crumbling into his arms.  
How could he handle such noises, such a level of attention over him during such a bad moment ?

As the applauses didn’t seem to cease yet, Rockstar brought his right hand to his mouth and whistled loudly. The auditorium’s structure made so that the piercing sound resonnated over the many walls of the large room. It even seemed to calm the audience a little. But that was not his intention.   
As Mint Choco finally laid his eyes on him, he knew that his little trick had worked.

For a split second, the musician truly smiled. Barely an instant later, he grabbed his bow, brought his violin to his shoulder and stuck it under his chin. That single movement stopped the applauses almsot immediately. The silence became deafening, until the first note came out of the instrument’s strings.

Rockstar relaxed in his seat as the young man began to play the first move of his latest composition. A bothering whisper came from his left, where the sour old lady was. She had seemingly not liked his little whistle at all.   
The guitarist shrugged it off. He did not want to cause a commotion at his boyfriend’s representation. He would, however, accidentally jerk his foot into the woman’s leg if she didn’t shut up soon.

The music was divine, just like expected. One month of performances and rehearsals did real wonders on that handful of music pieces. Mint Choco absolutely deserved his title of genius.

But if no sound was off-key, the violinist’s behavior absolutely was. Although was it in a subtle way, as he would never dare to ruin a performance with his stress. It was only a matter of a movement that was slightly too sharp here, a rhythm that had an occasional hiccup there.   
But to Rockstar, who had seen Mint Choco practice in his pajamas several times during their lazy Sundays at home, that felt wrong. Absolutely wrong.

The first sign was his smile. It was not the true, sincere smile he usually wore when performing, a smile that sticked around even in front of hundreds of people. The lovely smile that the violinist was wearing at this instant was the false smile. The one that he kept for outdoors. Not the smile of someone who was enjoying himself.  
Of course, unaware people would never realize it. As the only one that personally knew the musician in this large room, Rockstar mentally applauded him for hiding his uneasiness so expertly. After all, people could not realize that something was missing if they had never seen it.

This statement also applied to his movements. Mint Choco was unusually stiff and static. Of course, it always took him a little while to fully get into his melody. Yet thirty minutes into his performance, the musician had barely moved of an inch on the stage.  
This was something that Rockstar had never seen happening. The violinist usually moved around in rhythm, dancing almost. Because to him like to the guitarist, a true concert was not only about music. The artist needed to give a stunning performance as well.

How many of his concerts had he spent standing up on only one spot like that ?   
That plaguing thought was not leaving the rocker’s mind.

The violinist’s eyes were barely opened, something that at last was usual. He was enjoying his music too after all, just like everyone else in the auditorium.  
Yet as he slipped his sight over the whole audience, Rockstar caught a glance at his mint eyes and stiffened up. His dazzling green eyes… Had not light in them. The usual alluring shine was nowhere to be found.   
Mint Choco was fighting against himself not to collapse right here, in front of everyone.

The guitarist’s mind was racing, his heart beating loudly in his chest, almost panicking in the middle of the attentive yet relaxed crowd.  
But there was nothing he could do. Nothing, except endure a pain that was probably two hundreds time smaller than the one that was borne by the young musician on the stage.

So Rockstar wore a smile. His most sincere one. The kind that even his lover did not see often.

He immediately caught another detail on the violinist’s face. The smallest, absolutely tiniest frown of the inner part of his eyebrows.

Mint Choco wanted to cry.

But he had to keep on playing.


	3. Chapter 3

Three rounds of applauses followed the end of the performance. This made the violinist come back to bow twice but the audience was not able to get any more sound out of him and his instrument.  
When the red curtain finally fell back over the stage, Rockstar grabbed his leather jacket in a hurry, jumped from his seat and pushed everyone aside to get out of the row. That raised many grunts and discontented exclamations but he did not care. Even the grumpy woman’s screeching voice did not truly reach his ears.

He ran right outside of the concert hall. The many fancy corridors he found himself in slightly disoriented him. He decided to go against the direction that the panels’ arrows pointed to until he arrived around the stage’s level. It was only a matter of minutes before he was relieved to see what he was searching for. A big « Entry Prohibited » sign resting over top of a metallic chain, next to an imposant bodyguard.

« It’s the backstages here. No one is allowed beyond this point. » The man announced, his arms calmly crossed across his torso.

« I’ve got a pass. » Rockstar said in a hurry, taking a crumpled piece of paper out of his jacket.

The guard took his sweet time to slowly reach over to the sheet, smooth it out until it was almost completely wrinkle-free and finally take a look at it.

« I’ll need your ID too, Mister. »

Rockstar refrained a swear as he frantically searched into his pocket. It took him some more precious seconds to find his wallet and finally took his ID card out.

« There. Happy ? » He asked with a sharp tone, unable to restrain himself any longer.

The man frowned in a way that immediately made him regret his words. He knew for a fact that this bodyguard right here could lock him in the security room for the next hour or so for absolutely any reason, as he had been protected by such kind of agent once.  
But he just _could not wait_.

« Go on your way. »

Finally getting his papers back, Rockstar rushed into the corridor without even muttering a « thank you ». Fortunately –although maybe not, in most other cases–, the power of a VIP pass overruled any rude behavior.

He found himself lost in a labyrinth of corridors once more and damned his past self for not having been more attentive earlier, when he had first gone through it. He had been too excited about seeing his boyfriend again to truly care about his surroundings at that moment.  
Although he was still eager to see him now. But the reasons had changed completely.

A crowd’s noisy chatting ended up catching his attention and finally led him to where he wanted to be. Over the sea of the tour team members’ and auditorium employees’ heads, he caught a glance at his lover’s green and white signature hairstyle.   
His own presence was however not welcomed for now, as it was time for feedback and administrative matters. Rockstar could swear all he wanted but he knew that he was not allowed to intervene right now.

It took fifteen painful minutes of chatter before Mint Choco was allowed to go back into his private room. The guitarist did not even wait for the manager and his assistant to actually go around the corner before running toward the room’s door. He entered without knocking.

Mint Choco was turning his back to the entrance, walking toward his violin case to finally dispose of his instrument. He then began unstraightening his bow’s hair, all of that at a painfully slow speed. Rockstar did not wait for him to be finished to reach him and wrap his arms around his shoulders.

« My little darling, my poor thin mint… » He let out as he pulled him against his chest, burying his face into his so well done hair.

There was no other sound for a moment. The guitarist firmly closed his eyes. His heart was still racing in his chest.  
He finally felt warmth on his hands. Mint Choco’s fingers were so shaky that they could barely hold onto his.

« I wanna go home… »

This single sentence, pronounced as a whimper in the most fragile, almost child like voice broke into loud sobs. Rockstar hugged him harder. His heart was aching for his lover.

They couldn’t stay here like that. Mint Choco needed calmness. He had to get him home before anything else.

The rocker reluctantly let go of the violinist who immediately covered his face with his hands. A look around the room informed him that the luggage was way to big to be brought home on his bike. Yet they couldn’t leave all of Mint Choco’s personnal stuff behind, unsupervised.  
He walked over to the door and violently opened it. His eyes met an auditorium employee that was going through the corridor, now startled by the guitarist’s unexpected action.

« Get to the manager or whoever is in charge of this damn tour and tell him to get Mint’s stuff at home asap ! We’re going now ! »

Rockstar closed the door without any other explaination, barely seeing the confused expression on the person’s face. Walking back in the room, his sight laid on a copy of Mint Choco’s contract on the desk. He grabbed it and went over to the violinist’s backpack, opening it and shoving it in. The young artist had hopefully not left anything else around.

« I’m getting you home, candy boy. But you need to get a hold of yourself. » The guitarist said in a calmer voice as he walked over to his boyfriend’s instrument case.

He quickly finished dismounting the violin’s shoulder pad and was packing the bow away when he heard a change in Mint Choco’s breathing pattern. The performer was doing as he had just been told. Despite living through an absolute demise, he was still trying to get a hold of himself.  
He was so strong.

Rockstar closed the case and grabbed his lover’s backpack, handing it to him.

« I know it’s hard. I… I can’t even imagine how fucking hard it is. But please, you… You need to get that on your back. You know it won’t be practical if I do it. »

His face drenched in tears, his make-up fading away, Mint Choco grabbed his bag without any complaint.   
The guitarist wanted to get him home as fast as possible, yet he couldn’t help but get him once more into an embrace.

« You are so, so fucking strong, my lil’ thin mint. Very fucking strong. »

Rockstar didn’t usually use nicknames. There were the usual « baby », « darling » and everything like that of course, but the special ones… They only came out when Mint Choco was at his absolute lowest point.  
And he had just used a few of them. Three times.

He let go of his dear musician once again but immediately put his free hand on his face. He wiped the smudged make-up away. Now that Mint Choco was officialy considered as a famous, independant artist, any faux pas could lead to terrible consequences. And even the national news would not hesitate to talk about how the new, prodigious violinist had ended his first tour being totally broken. He could absolutely not let that happen, especially after all the efforts that his boyfriend had put in to cover his mental distress.

Rockstar couldn’t help but place a soft kiss on his forehead either. The unusual warmth under his lips was a grim reminder of his lover’s horrible health state. He couldn’t exactly remember how hot his skin was before the concert but he was almost certain that his fever had gotten worse since then.

« This is the last step. We’re almost there. » He let out in a low voice. « It’s the hardest but you’ll be totally free afterward. »

The violinist weakly nodded. Rockstar let him properly put his backpack on and grabbed his hand before finally leading him to the door.

« That fucking tour is finally over, Thin mint. »

Mint Choco struggled to even think straight. His mind was so focused on the dreadful fear and anxiety that were filling up his entire body that everything else was a blur. He had acted automatically with no other intention than to finish that atrocious day ever since Rockstar had left his room, right before his concert. His music, his little spoken interventions, his chat with the manager and the rest of the team… He could not actually remember what had happened. He had only done as he had always been told. He had done just enough to keep up appearances.

His only memory from the concert was the awfully loud round of applause which had preceded his performance. A sound so loud that it had made him want to run away from the stage to go hide in the most darkest and smallest corner he could manage to find. The rest of his spectacle had formed into a meddle of sounds that he had almost grown tired to hear over time. A mix of music pieces that filled the background of his internal struggle, which consisted of resisting the will to just drop everything to the ground, including himself.

He was no one. Barely anything. Just a thing for people’s amusement.   
He needed to be perfect, not to be proud of himself but only to please the others.   
He was an object.

Yet there was this man. He could not comprehend his actions.  
This man had held him in his arms like his mother used to do, before she began hating him. Before she had revealed that she only wanted him to follow her plans for his future.  
Was he going to consider him as a thing as well ? A soulless musician, whose task consisted only of playing his violin like a living music box ?

He was so scared of this thought. Because he wanted to be. He wanted to live like the human he thought he was.  
He was a human. But were people actually acknowledging it… ?

He wanted to disappear. To go away. To flee this stage’s spotlights and hide in the shadows.  
He was so tired.

Yet that little spark. That little spark that came from one spot in the audience. That little spark that illuminated the face of this man, in the middle seat of the fourth row.  
That spark told him to hold on. To keep being strong, because that whole horrible thing was going to end soon.

He truly wanted to be. He was just so scared not to be accepted as he wanted to. As a human. He felt so broken.  
So he only held onto that spark. That bit of warmth that, yes, did fluctuate, but which would always come back. That spark who was always staying with him.

And before he knew it, the evening’s cold wind was blowing on his face, the harsh air stinging his lungs after the many days spent in the secluded, closed up spaces that constituted the many auditoriums he had visited. He was outside, under the night’s moonlight. The temperature was freezing him and his light formal costume, despite his head’s unbearably hot warmth.   
But most importantly, it was silent. No one to be seen, on that lonely sidewalk, under one of the streetlamps’ artificial light.   
After the undying agitation he had lived through, that felt more relieving than he thought it would.

« Dammit ! Why does it… »

Mint Choco instinctively turned his head when he heard that sudden exclamation. Right to his side, a white haired man was busying himself over a motorbike’s small luggage box.

Rockstar.

« Gah ! Finally !! »

The guitarist opened the case, taking out a bike helmet and a leather jacket that the violinist recognized as his own.

« Here ya go, Thin mint. » He said in a gentle voice, handing him the clothe.

Mint Choco stayed motionless for a brief instant, still processing his surroundings and trying to make sense of everything. He finally slid his backpack straps off his shoulders and put the jacket on. It wasn’t doing much as an isolator but was quite effective at blocking the gushes of winds.

« I know you won’t like it but I only took one helmet. Couldn’t find yours. » Rockstar continued, holding the object out. « And I want you to put it on. »

The violinist spent another instant just looking at his boyfriend in bewilderment. But a habit he hadn’t had the occasion to use for a month suddenly kicked in and he tried to talk.

« N-… No, Rockstar, y-… »

The words didn’t properly come out through his throat. He was anyway immediately interrupted by the other musician and soon found the helmet placed on his head.

« It wasn’t a question, Minty. You’re putting it on. »

The guitarist took upon himself to straighten the strap around Mint Choco’s chin and clip it on. The violinist spent this small instant glancing at his lover’s face.  
Rockstar had the same kind of speech and manner than usual but he could catch hints of his worries. His mouth’s right corner was slightly tensed up. He couldn’t stop fiddling with his fingers, even when he had nothing in hand. And most importantly, his grey eyes weren’t shining with his typical excitement.

Was… He the reason of such worries ? The young artist’s mind screamed at him that of course, Rockstar was worrying about him. But a larger part of himself yelled back, louder, assuring that it wasn’t true. That no one truly worried about a mere object.

He felt his whole body being shaken up with anxiety and anger. He…  
He couldn’t hold it anymore. At all.

« Your violin won’t fit in the luggage space… »

Rockstar hadn’t noticed it. He was trying to find a position in which the violin case would let the box close down properly, but nothing worked. He finally turned back at him, visibly willing to ask him something… But his facial traits were once again distorted by worries. At least was that what Mint Choco could see in between his tears and the blur of the fogged helmet’s visor.

« My poor Thin mint… »

The guitarist pulled him close. The violinist just sobbed inside of the head protector.

« It’ll be alright, Minty. It’ll be alright… The moment we’re home, I’m gonna give you the best cuddles you ever received. Just you wait for it. »

Mint Choco kept on crying. He felt the comforting warmth of his lover embracing him, the soft hugs he had been bereaved of during one desperately too long month. His heart screamed at him that he was indeed, truly loved. That almost inaudible call in the middle of his self-loathing mess of a mind made him cry harder.  
The two lovers stayed there, immobile under the blinding ray of the streetlamp’s light for a solid five minutes.

Rockstar could still feel his boyfriend’s body being shaken by sobs as they travelled through the city on his bike. Mint Choco’s arms were locked around him so tightly that it almost hurt but the guitarist would not allow him to change in any ways.


	4. Chapter 4

Unable to dry his tears because of the helmet, the violinist found his face literally drenched when Rockstar finally stopped his vehicule in front of the building they lived in. Mint Choco stood motionlessly on the side while his boyfriend carefully secured his bike for the night. It was only when the guitarist unclipped the helmet’s strap and took it off his head that the young performer was able to properly see again.  
The first thing his eyes caught was his lover’s face, wearing a warm smile that wasn’t lighting up his expression in the usual manner but in an uncommon, calmer one. The white haired man gently caressed his wet cheeks with one of his hands, cupped it and brought Mint Choco’s head toward his.

They shared a long, soft kiss. The crying artist held to that warmth like to a life buoy. He tried his best to grab all of that affection and throw it against the monster of self-deprecation that was plaguing his mind.

Pulling away, Rockstar grabbed his hand and gently pulled him inside of the building. The corridor’s bright lights and the product that was used to clean the collective parts’ familliar scent fueled a strange kind of nostalgy in Mint Choco’s stomach.   
An elevator ride later, the sound of the front foor of their flat opening brought a steady thought in his mind.

It was not nostalgy. He really was back home. He had a home, here. With Rockstar.   
He was loved for who he was. For being Mint Choco.

The awful beast took a step back inside his mind but tears shone at the corner of his eyes again. This time, he didn’t even know why.

« Welcome home, s-… Oh, my candy boy… »

Rockstar’s voice became clearer as the man turned toward him. The violinist was ragingly pulling on the bottom of his leather vest when he felt both of his lover’s hands cupping his cheeks.

« It’s alright. Let it all out. It ain’t good to hold back. » The rocker gently said, laying his forehead against his.

 _« But it’s the third time already ! »_ The thought resonnated in Mint Choco’s mind like the voice of an angry parent.

« I… I-I… I’m… I’m sorry… »

He didn’t manage to let out more than that and even so, the last syllabus sounded like a whimper.

« We’ve got all the time in the world, Thin mint. It’s just the both of us, at home, with no annoying fan or pesky manager to bother us. » Rockstar continued, placing several small kisses on his lover’s drenched cheeks in between his words. « You are safe here. I want you to be okay and we’ll slowly work toward that. No need to rush. »

The violinist did his best to nod but several hiccups cut his movement. The guitarist kept pecking kiss after kiss on his cheeks and nose while gently rubbing the tears away with his thumbs.

« Let’s get more comfortable, alright ? So we can talk about all of that madness. » He proposed, already moving his hands down to Mint Choco’s jacket.

He offered no opposition to that and was quickly gotten rid of his leather coat and his white tailcoat, alongside the heavy backpack he had carried all the way to here. He instinctively walked over to the couch and crashed on it, almost landing on his lover’s acoustic guitar while said owner was zipping his own jacket off.

A moment later, the guitar had been pushed away and the two were sitting on the sofa. Mint Choco snuggled against his boyfriend, curling up despite the tight outfit he was wearing, while Rockstar wrapped one of his arms around his shoulder and laid his head on top of his.   
None of them said anything. The rocker was just enjoying his lover’s return, trying to figure out what he could do to actually help him calm down.  
Immediately attempting to do something would have been useless anyway as the violinist, eyes wide opened despite his tears, was silently getting overwhelmed.

Everything felt… so familliar, because it was ! It was the place where he lived ! The place where he slept, practiced, ate. The place where his boyfriend played his guitar for fun, the place where they had improvised jam sessions together.  
This was the household where he was always loved.

He could see himself, getting home after a day spent rehearsing and performing, only to find Rockstar asleep on the couch, his acoustic guitar laying in his hands, the living room’s floor covered with wires that linked to his amp. Anyone would probably have scolded the guitarist for leaving their main room in such a mess, but Mint Choco never did.   
Despite the appearances, he knew full well that it was not him that was keeping their flat tidied up. It was his boyfriend. His composition and jam sessions were the only times where Rockstar ‘forgot’ to clean up.

This was only one of the many memory that he loved dearly. A scene he had earned to live through, after all the messes that had happened in his life. After having been thrown out of his home, lived on the street, struggled to begin his career. He had earned the right to cuddle in this small but cozy flat where no controlling parent or annoying manager could reach him. He had earned the right to live in the arms of the most handsome man he knew.

… Did he ?   
How had he earned all of that ? What could have made Rockstar choose _him_ ? He was the homeless hobo. Just a kid that could not even follow what others told him to do.

Why him ?

His sobs grew bigger than ever but ended up stuck in his throat. Mint Choco began gasping for air, almost choking.

« Minty ? Mint !! Mint Choco ! »

Rockstar immediately straightened up and pushed his lover’s legs away to free his chest.

« Come on, Mint !! Breathe !! »

The sobs finally came out and the violinist’s tears flowed harder. The guitarist couldn’t help but let a sigh of relief out. This was such a scary situation to deal with.

Despite his horrible thoughts, Mint Choco couldn’t resist the will to snuggle his face against the one person that had chosen him, whatever the reason was. He needed comfort, now.   
He just hoped that this was not all a lie. That he would not be thrown out on the street again for not being up to his expectations.

He felt a hand trace the shape of his face and slowly stroke his cheeks.

« Minty… My little Thin mint… Shh… » He heard Rockstar whisper. « It’s okay, now. We’re home, just the two of us. There’s no danger here. Don’t worry. »

The violinist couldn’t stay with these thoughts. He needed to know, now.  
He needed to know if he had to pack all of his stuff by tomorrow.

« R-... Ro-… Rock… Star… » He difficultly managed to say through his many hiccups, still refusing to show his face.

« Yes, my darling ? » The guitarist softly answered, not caressing his cheeks for a second.

« Y-… You… »

He had no idea how to ask that question. It was so… Weird.  
It was so terrifying.

« You… A… I am… You… like m-… me ? »

There wasn’t even a second of silence before a little giggle could be heard.

« I would not say that. »

The violinist’s heart literally stopped beating for a small instant.

« It’s not like. It’s love. »

Mint Choco stayed immobile, almost shocked. He gasped again. Rockstar, alerted, immediately turned toward him and gently stroked his hair.

« I didn’t want to scare you ! But really… I don’t like you, I love you ! Every day we were apart for this last month, I was feeling down. I can stand a single day because I know I’ll be seeing you in the evening, but a month ?! What am I supposed to do during a whole month without you ?! »

Mint Choco felt his cheeks burning up. But not by the kind of burn he had felt during these last days.  
It was the kind of burn that was giving him just enough bravery to finally lift his head.

« Do you really think I let everyone just cuddle by my side ? Nuh-uh, you may be a genius of a violinist but you’re pretty terrible at that. These hugs, I keep them just for you. » Rockstar continued before gently pressing his finger multiple times on the tip of the violinist’s nose. « Just. For. You. »

The young artist felt his heart beat harder in his chest. But it was not painful.   
It felt as sweet as the blushing that was reddening his boyfriend’s cheeks right now.

« It… It’s because I… I-… I… » He tried to find the strength to give him an explaination, once again struggling to get his words out.

It was that his truth hurt so much.

« I… Feel like… A thing. Just… A thing… A toy that everyone wants, gets… entertained with, but just for a while… and then gets thrown out. »

Rockstar raised his eyebrows but Mint Choco was unable to see through his emotions. He didn’t know if he was suprised or… Just expecting what he had said.

« Because… Be… Because I… It already happened. It… My parents… I wasn’t… Up to their standards so they… They threw me out. To them, me doing… My things was not possible. »

His tears began flowing again as soon as he talked about his past life.

« And… And then… » He continued, his voice cracking over and over again. « And then… The tour… It was… The same thing. I… I had to be perfect. All the time. All so… Perfect. I was so scared. So scared to mess up. So scared to… Everything. To be late… To stutter… To… E… Everything if… If I was not… I… I had nightmares where… I was just thrown out… On the side of the road… Away from everything. I… Could not go anywhere and… I died there… Alone… Cold…

-My lil’ Thin mint… Shh…

-And… And the… The m-manager… Always c-complaining that… That… I d-didn’t train enough or… I… I p-played a n-note off-key… I was so afraid… So afraid that they would just… Give me up… »

Rockstar pulled him into a tight hug as soon as he was finished.

This scenario was of course impossible. The manager couldn’t just abandon his main artist inthe middle of a tour. There was no way this would ever happen. But even the voice of reason hadn’t been able to beat Mint Choco’s irrealistic anxiety.   
An anxiety he had had nowhere to pour out for a whole month.

« And then… And then… » The violinist continued anyway, his voice muffled by his boyfriend’s clothes. « And then I was scared that… Y-you… You would… Do the same… Because I can’t… I can’t be perfect ! I can’t ! I’m… Not a toy ! Not a thing… Just a human… I’m… Just a human… Just a human… »

He was gasping loudly for air once again. Rockstar slightly let go of him but he soon felt a hand on his chin, lifting his head.

« Mint Choco. Listen to me, darling. Do you want to hear what I think about you ? »

The violinist nodded. He was barely able to sustain his lover’s sight but the rocker didn’t let him look away.

« In my purest honesty, I swear on my rocker’s career… You are the most wonderful person I’ve ever met. And not only for your violin skills. You are the kid who went against his parents and made it to success anyway. You are the kid who went from living in the street to being known across the country. You are the man who spent a whole month holding on and being perfect ! »

The intention was here, the words carefully chosen, yet that last bit still hurt him.

« I do not mean that lightly, Mint Choco. » Rockstar continued, noticing his wince. « You really were perfect. I only noticed that you weren’t feeling good because we’ve been sharing the same god damn bed for years ! And I don’t think anyone else in that damn concert hall has done the same. At least I hope. »

He let a giggle out but knew that it wasn’t fitting the circumstances.

« It’s a joke, of course. I truly believe in you. I truly believe that you do not cheat on me. » The guitarist said with a smile. « I believe that you love me. And I love you. Above and beyond everything else. I love you more than anything, Mint Choco. Even more than my red sugar pearl. »

The violinist was fully focused on his boyfriend’s face now. A face that was as red as the guitar he had just mentioned.

« You cannot always be perfect, and so what ? What’s the deal ? I’m the guy for almost got lost in the auditorium three times today and that rode his bike without any kind of helmet ! Does that make me less loveable to your eyes ? Pretty sure it doesn’t. And that was just today ! Do you imagine to how much it adds up on my entire lifetime ? »

A last silence.  
Rockstar took a deep breath.

« I’ll tell you what you are to my eyes, Mint Choco. You are the man who accepted me for what I am. The guy who is willing to live with my singing, my long hair and my earrings. You’re the guy who accepts my stupid nicknames and the fact I still drink hot cocoa at breakfast like a fucking five years old. You are the guy I’m willing to spend the rest of my life with. And I’d rather like you to be a human. Because objects are pretty tame when it comes to ‘’aggressive cuddling’’. »

The guitarist brought his boyfriend’s face closer with his hand and kissed him right on the lips in the gentlest way he had ever kissed. Mint Choco slowly gave in, accepting his contact, his warmth and his love.  
Rockstar immediately put his forehead back against his after pulling away.

« You are willing to accept me with all of my flaws. So please, let me see yours. All the times where you feel down, all your off-key notes. I love hearing you practice, even when you fail. You’re so cute when you swear against your music sheets. »

Mint Choco felt tears get to his eyes for the… He had lost count of how many times he had cried today.   
He just wrapped his arms around his boyfriend’s shoulders, bringing him into another hug. These hugs he just loved so much.

« I… I’m sorry…

-Shh… Don’t be. It’s alright. Everyone has these sorts of moment.

-N-no… I’m sorry for… having doubted you. I was… I was so scared. So, so scared.

-It’s alright, darling ! To me… It only confirms that you love me that much. But don’t be fooled. I love you more. »

The violinist let a small giggle escape his lips. It felt like it had been ages since it had last arrived.  
This only made his boyfriend enjoy it more.

« Aah, and that laugh ! How can I resist to that, honestly ?! » He exclaimed, nuzzling his nose against his cheeks.

Mint Choco smiled. One of his true smiles. The one he kept for his friends and for the love of his life.

« Honestly, the only moment where I would even barely consider you as an object is when I think of you as my lil’ Thin mint. » Rockstar continued with a joyful tone. « You’re my little cookie, my sweet little Thin mint cookie ! Do you accept to be my little cookie ? »

The violinist chuckled again, softly.

« Well… If you also talk about gingerbread mans, they look like humans so… I think I can accept that. » He answered, laying his hand on the guitarist’s cheek.

They went for another long, loving kiss. Mint Choco could very well stay in that position forever. He was the happiest than he had ever recalled being these last weeks. The comforting warmth, familliar scent, softness of his boyfriend’s skin and the couch under them… It all felt so good.  
He had earned it all. He deserved them all. He deserved his happiness.

The self-loathing monster had to take several steps back in his mind when he confronted it to that situation. There was no doubt that he was going to keep Rockstar’s words near his heart just in case this abomination came back.

« Honestly… » The guitarist said after the kiss, still holding him close to himself. « The only freak that has taken part to that tour of yours was your fucking manager. You’ll keep him on hold until I’m free. I’ve got a few things to say to that prick. »

Mint Choco smiled, staying silent. He could not bring himself to openly admit that he hated that man but… Needless to say that he was quite enjoying his boyfriend’s protective attitude.


	5. Chapter 5

They could have both stayed here for the rest of the night but a grumbling suddenly attracted their attention. Rockstar immediately straightened back up.

« You haven’t eaten yet ?! » He exclaimed loudly. « How’s that ?! That man is definitely going to get a call from me ! »

Mint Choco smiled but also slightly frowned. His sight skittered away.

« No… I had a meal before but… I just wasn’t hungry. And I… I’m still not now.

-Minty, your stomach literally just grumbled. »

His smirk disappeared. He was not good at finding excuses with such tiredness on his shoulders.

« I… I couldn’t eat. I was too… messed up. » He finally admitted. « And now… I don’t know, now.

-You need to eat, darling. You can’t go to bed on an empty stomach. » Rockstar announced with a calmer, slightly worried voice.

« I… I can’t, Rocky. I can’t. 

-If I made you a bit of rice porridge, would you take a bite or two ? »

The violinist nodded. He knew that he didn’t actually have a choice. His lover was really stubborn when worried.

« Alright then. You don’t move from here, I’ll be right back. »

Rockstar totally released him, got up and disappeared toward the kitchen, almost tripping over his amp’s wires while doing so. Mint Choco chuckled at that but his smile faded when his lover got out of sight.

His mind was now a bit more at peace but that calmness made him realize how badly his body was wrecked. His eyes were stinging from having cried so much, he had a severely snotty nose and he suddenly felt awfully cold without his boyfriend’s comforting warmth. Ignoring years of strict education in manners, he rubbed the snot off his face with his costume’s sleeve and slid his beautifully waxed shoes off without untying the laces. He was going to wash the entirety of his clothes anyway. He wanted to get rid of the stuffy smell that had inscruted them during the tour.

Turning toward the sofa’s backrest, he grabbed the perfectly folded up dark red cover that was resting on top of it, exactly like when he had left the flat one month earlier. He unfolded it and quickly snuggled into it for warmth, curling up on the couch until he only looked like a green and white haired head mounted on top of a vermillion egg. Sighing in delight, he was met with his lover’s alluring smell. Although not the one that many smelled outside, where he tended to use a bit of perfume. It was the one he wore when he was just barely emerging from his slumber and pondering whether he would go back to sleep or not.

Considering the messy piles of music sheets and papers covered in handwriting on the low coffee table, Rockstar had probably spent most of his time at home composing. Even though he was currently recording his first album and all of its songs were already entirely written, he could not stop creating new ones. Most of them stayed at the state of unfinished drafts that nobody would ever hear but Mint Choco. He always felt lucky about that.  
This was Rockstar’s way to evacuate all the kinds of stress he might experience in his reckless life.   
And when he was composing, he never minded time passing, nor tidying up after himself right away. The violinist didn’t doubt a single second that his lover had passed many nights sleeping on that couch, dozzing off from hours of composing in that very cover, rather than in the bed that they shared together.

The poor sweetheart. He must have felt so lonely. Mint Choco tenderly smiled at that though.  
The rocker was so adorable.

He had definitely missed him. A lot. More than he could even imagine.   
He was so happy and relieved to finally be home, where everything now smelled like Rockstar since his own smell hadn’t been there to counterbalance it.

« The rice’s almost ready. » He heard Rockstar’s voice coming from the kitchen, right before he saw his head peaking through the door frame. « Oh, are you cold ?

-Yeh… I’m a bit tired.

-You should be ! » The guitarist exclaimed, before walking through the living room to a door on the opposite side.

He disappeared in their shared bathroom while Mint Choco brought the cover to the bottom of his face. Several chills kept travelling through his body despite that.

For how long has he been like that exactly ? He couldn’t even remember.

« There. »

The violinist slightly lifted his head to see his boyfriend get back to him and stick something on his forehead. Before he even had the time to ask what was going on, a faint beeping noise came from whatever was up there.

« Thirty-nine degrees. That’s what I thought. » Rockstar softly said before gently taking the sticker off, being careful not to pull too hard on Mint Choco’s skin. « You’re rocking a nasty fever. »

That would explain his current poor state. The violinist nuzzled his face back into the cover, suffering from the lack of warmth already.

« Really, Minty… Working yourself to the point of getting sick, and then continuing anyway… What had passed through your head ?

-Anxiety, probably. »

Rockstar drew a pained smile. They both knew that the young musician hadn’t really had a choice. First impressions were essential and that had been his very first tour.

« Still, you should have asked for a few days off… » The guitarist let out before announcing with a more assured voice. « But the past is the past. We’re living in the now. You’re home and you won’t be overworking yourself anymore. Not under my watch ! »

Rockstar bent down and laid a gentle kiss on his forehead.

« It’s full time rest for you now. »

Mint Choco winced under the blanket but he knew that he couldn’t escape his boyfriend’s wish. The white haired musician was _really_ stubborn in these moments.  
And it wasn’t like he himself was in shape to do anything else.

« You shouldn’t kiss me if I’m sick, Starlight… » He let out faintly.

« I do whatever the heck I want. » The rocker answered before immediately kissing his forehead again.

The violinist giggled as his lover got properly back up and carefully stepped over the mess of wires on the ground to go put the thermometer away.

A fizzing noise came from the kitchen while he was gone in the bathroom.

« Huh… » Mint Choco muttered.

« Oh shit, the rice ! »

Rockstar burst through the living room to rush into the kitchen, once again almost tripping over his amp.

« It’s alright ! Nothing burnt ! »

The violinist softly smiled. If his boyfriend was a pro at keeping the house clean, he became a disaster when left alone in the kitchen. They had a good chemistry when it came to household keeping but the young performer was grateful for him not having burnt the house down during his leave. Although considering the few empty bags of take-away food, he could imagine how Rockstar had managed such a great feat.   
He closed his eyes as he thought about all the meals he could cook him now that he was home. He, in fact, enjoyed cooking quite a lot. He was not the best at it but it was always a great time. He however enjoyed baking even more, as cake decorating was a lot of fun and his lover’s sweet tooth assured him that he would always have someone to taste his creations and point the flaws out.

A few less worrying noises came from the kitchen and the guitarist finally got back to the living room with a single small bowl of rice porridge. He put it on the coffee table, on top of all of his drafts while his boyfriend slightly unwrapped from his egg like position until he was able to properly reach and eat the rice. Rockstar sat back on the couch as Mint Choco took his first bite.

The taste was extremely plain, so much so that he wondered if salt had even been sprikled in there. He however had to be careful not to burn his tongue as the food was indeed properly heated up.  
But that was not the actual problem. Swallowing the porridge felt like trying to ingest a rock and that single first bite was feeling incredibly heavy on his stomach. The torture that had been eating for the last week or two was still here.  
The artist still forced himself to get another spoonful in. His body was so messed up by stress and fatigue that he could barely feel his hunger anymore but he knew he had to eat. Even that trial would be better than to faint from hypoglycemia, like it had almost happened a few times during the last days of the tour.

He was so focused on trying to get some food in that he didn’t realize that his boyfriend was calling someone until the rocker brought his phone to his ear.

« Huh ? » He began with his mouth full of porridge before he forced himself to swallow it, wincing in the process. « Who… Who are you calling ?

-Cocoa. » Was the single answer.

Mint Choco raised an eyebrow. Cocoa was a lovely lady, just slightly older than him, that he had met while living on the street. Despite only being a passerby, she had always been attentionate toward him. What had begun as a daily coin thrown into his violin case, a smile, a small applause at the end of his performances had progressively escalated into a daily little chat, amongst the only ones Mint Choco had had in this period of his life. As he was still homeless when the winter month had come around, she had always made sure to leave him a pretty penny, ask him about his needs and health, occasionally letting him take a warm shower at her home to freshen up. Living in awfully small flat herself, she couldn’t have possibly be able to support the both of them but Mint Choco was forever grateful to this generous passerby who had been part of the very few things preventing him from totally giving up during that tough period.

Although he was always happy to see her… Why was his boyfriend of all people calling her now ?

« I’ll ask her to come stay with you tomorrow. » Rockstar explained without even needing to be asked, waiting for the lady to answer her phone.

« You… Won’t you be here ? » His boyfriend asked back, slightly frowning.

« Nah. I’ve got a recording session at the studio tomorrow. Sorry, sugar. »

The violinist was definitely disappointed. He craved to stay home with his lover so much…

Another thought suddenly struck him.

« Oh ! But I am supposed to come with you !

-Nah nah nah nah. No way. You’re legally sick. You’re staying home.

-That doesn’t mean anything. » Mint Choco noted, still frowning. « And I’m not a child ! I don’t need to be baysat !

-You sure are not but you’re not a loner either. Staying at home sick and alone all day, it must get pretty depressing quickly. »

The violinist couldn’t deny that. He currently had no will to stay alone with his thoughts, in any way whatsoever.

« You’re right… Sorry. I must be such a trouble to take care of… » He mumbled.

« She’s not answering… I’ll try again later. » Rockstar muttered as well, putting his phone down before turning toward the other. « What did you say ? »

The young man was surprised, unable to decide if the question was genuine or not. The guitarist however quickly laid back against him, wrapping an arm around his shoulder and laying a big kiss on his cheek.

« I dare you to say that again, Thin Mint. I dare you. » He said in a joyful voice.

Mint Choco let a little chuckle out, laying his head against his lover’s chest.

« Sorry… » He quietly said, a small smile on his face.

« That’s not what I want to hear. » He continued, as playfully as ever.

« I am… »

The violinist took a deep breath. What he was going to say felt so pretentious and self-centered, it felt so… Weird.

« I am the most wonderful man you ever met. » He finally announced, blushing.

« Yup ! You sure are. »

The sick musician put the bowl of porridge on the couch and fully indulged into a cuddle against Rockstar, smiling. The guitarist passed his other arm over his lover, pulling him into a true hug, his head buried in the violinist’s now slightly messy hair.

« I’ll get that self-confidence level up by any means, I swear to you. Just you wait. » He let out, his voice muffled by his boyfriend’s haircut.

Mint Choco didn’t answer anything to that. He just enjoyed the hug.

They could have actually slept on the spot together but Rockstar decided to act when he noticed his lover’s eyes genuinely closing.

« You should take a shower before going to sleep. You know, get out of that suit. Not that I don’t like that look of yours, of course. »

He heard a faint giggle and Mint Choco lifted his head.

« I’ll do. I can’t really bear wearing it anymore. »

The violinist however snuggled back against him for a second before laying a quick kiss on his mouth. The guitarist smiled at that.

« I’ll take care of that. » He announced as he saw him grab his bowl of porridge. « You’re not hungry anymore, I suppose ?

-No, sorry… »

He got the dish out of his hands.

« If you go on like that, I’ll have to ban that word from that household, I swear. »

His lover chuckled and muttered another « sorry » anyway. Rockstar let him go to the bathroom while he stood up to reach the kitchen.

The bowl was still half full. Mint Choco had barely been able to eat.

« Well, that’ll make for tomorrow’s breakfast. » He mumbled to himself as he poured the porridge back into the pot.

Although a quick taste from the very bottom of the bowl informed him that his mixture would need to have some kind of spice added to even be remotely enjoyable. Maybe that was the reason why his boyfriend didn’t eat that much. With all the fancy food he had enjoyed as a child, he was sometimes of a picky eater…  
He truly hoped this was the case. Because even if he had seemed to calm down, his health state was still worrying. And Rockstar was well aware that the tour wasn’t actually over yet. The violinist still needed to schedule a couple of appointments with his manager to discuss about the very last clauses of his contract and possibly prepare a new one.  
But this was not going to happen. Not on his watch. He knew that his status as the artist’s boyfriend didn’t legally represent anything but he was definitely going to talk to Mint Choco’s old professor about this. That former artist was basically his boyfriend’s mentor. He would know how to deal with the pesky manager, and hopefully help his former student to heal from that adventure as well.

Because the guitarist had to admit. It would be such a waste for Mint Choco to stop his musical career here. He had some true potential and he loved what he was doing. It was his dream and a possible life long job. This was truly his once in a lifetime occasion.   
But there was no point to it if it broke him that much. Rockstar wanted a happy boyfriend above and beyond everything else. Not a human’s hollow shell.

Mint Choco was so much more than the pretty sound of his fancy violin.

The beginning of his lover’s first ever concerto suddenly got him out of his thoughts and he exited the kitchen. His cellphone, left without much care on the living room’s coffee table, showed a picture of the pretty Cocoa. He immediately picked the call up.

« Rockstar here. » He announced immediately after bringing the phone to his ear.

« Rockstar ? You tried to call me. »

The lady’s warm voice was always a delight to hear, even when tinted like now with curiosity and even a little bit of worry. She had stayed very protective toward Mint Choco despite the increase of his level of life quality and that support had reached his boyfriend over time.

« I did. » He answered, although he was not sure if that had been a question. « Are you free tomorrow ?

-I am. Why ? »

The guitarist pondered his words. He didn’t want to trouble her more than necessary.

« It’s about Mint Choco. » He began as he walked over to the kitchen, the furthest room away from where his lover was.

He didn’t hear anything coming from his phone.

« He’s not going well at all. »

The very muffled sound of a few steps on the ground and fabric rubbing against itself came out of the speaker. Cocoa had probably just sat down.

« What’s the problem ? » She asked with a voice that was getting more and more stained with concerns.

« He just came home from his tour. I went to his last concert and… Right before he had to go on stage, he… Broke down in my arms. He was so tensed up, he could barely even cry. »

Nothing once again.

« He wasn’t himself during his performance. And he has kept on crying during all of the time I drove him home. And at home, he just cried and cried again…

-Why ? Did something bad happen ?

-I… Not exactly. » Rockstar answered, realizing he wasn’t going to the point at all. « He just kept on telling me about how he feels like an object, a thing that people get and throw away when they don’t need it anymore. He told me how his parents already did that to him and during the tour, he was constantly feeling like that. To the point where he genuinely doubted if I was even liking him. Not even loving him ! Just liking ! »

Another moment of silence.

« What had… Led him to think that ? I know him. He loves you more than anything. He never doubted you. » Cocoa ended up asking with a voice full of confusion.

« If only I could know ! I think it’s the stress, all that happened around him. But… To think it would get to him like that… It’s gotten so bad that he could barely breath at one point. And he’s gotten a fever ! I don’t know for how long but I took his temperature earlier. It’s not something that can just be shrugged off !! And he could barely eat either !!

-Rockstar, calm down… »

The rocker covered his mouth, realizing that he had spoken way louder than necessary.

« I’m sorry, Cocoa. I’m… just so worried.

-I understand. I am too. »

Another second of dreadful quietness settled down between the two of them.

« How is he going now ?

-A bit better. He managed to smile and he’s in the shower right now. But I barely got him to eat. He’s really, really not going well overall. »

He heard a sigh at the other end of the line. Cocoa could not hide her concerns.  
He couldn’t do it either. At all.

His shadow of a composure suddenly disappeared.

« I need help, Cocoa. Because Mint Choco… He… He wasn’t himself. He felt… Soulless. He had no light in his eyes. I was so worried, so terrified. »

His eyes began to sting with tears.

« I am… I’m so worried that he may attempt to harm himself if I’m not careful. He… He just… »

He let a muffled sob out, unable to hold it back anymore, before immediately covering his mouth again. He desperately wanted to hide his worries to his lover.

« Rockstar… I know you want to protect him the best you can but you cannot do everything for him. You… You need to have trust in him. Mint Choco is smart. He’ll figure it out eventually. »

The guitarist nodded, although that couldn’t be heard over the phone. His sniff however was.

« I know that boy. He’s very, very perfectionnist. He aims for the best. He may have just let himself get overwhelmed by this whole situation. But I know he’ll understand that he cannot do it all. And that people do love him for who he is. Violin put aside.

-I… I hope so…

-Mint Choco won’t take his own life, I am convinced of it. He may be in a bad place right now but he’ll get back up from it.

-I would… I’d hate myself for my entire life if he disappeared.

-He won’t. He’s just a bit shaken up. And you sound like you are too. Remember, it’s not your fault.

-I didn’t realize what was going on. I was talking to him almost daily and I didn’t notice it.

-Because he loves you too much to show you that.

-I sure… Wish he wouldn’t. I mean… That he would show me. Because that would worry me less.

-It’s something he’s got to learn, unfortunately… But he’s a smart boy. He’ll figure it out.

-I wish he’d let me in to his emotions though… That he’d let me see.

-You’re such a worrier, Rockstar… » Cocoa let out a sigh that almost sounded like a bittersweet smile. « But you’re not responsible for him. You need to learn that too. As for him, he’s just not used to showing them. After all, his music is way less direct and… follows the rules way more than yours. You gotta let him some time. Slowly work it together. But he has to do the thing. Not you. »

The guitarist nodded, trying to calm his heartbeat down.

« He… He’s still very broken at the moment though… Can you come tomorrow ? To keep an eye on him.

-You cannot be there ?

-Nah. Recording session. Sure wish I didn’t need to go.

-Alright then. I’ll come and keep him company.

-Thank you. Thank you so much, Cocoa.

-It’s not a problem. I’ll take good care of your little sugar cube, Rocky. » She announced with a chuckle. « But take care of yourself too, would you ? You cannot support your boyfriend if you’re also crumbling apart.

-I… I will. Thank you again.

-You’re welcome. See you tomorrow then. I’ll send you a text when I’ll get going.

-Yeh. See ya. »

Rockstar hung up before placing the phone on the counter, right in front ot him. He would clean the dishes but… For the moment, he just laid both of his hands on the surface, batting his eyelashes a few times. He wanted to get rid of these nasty tears.  
He wasn’t one to cry easily. He had kept his feelings hidden out of fear during almost all of his life.  
He knew he had some things to learn, just like his lover. He had to learn that he could occasionnaly let himself break down too.

Although for now, his only concern was to help Mint Choco climb back up the slope he had tumbled down over the last few weeks. He wanted to see him happy again. He wanted to see him finally gain his self confidence back.

Drying his tears off, he swore over his red sugar pearl that he was going to make that man proud of himself again.


	6. Chapter 6

It only took a few more minutes for the bathroom’s door to open. Rockstar left the sink where he had been washing the dishes in the meantime, quickly drying his hands in a piece of cloth. Mint Choco had gotten into the living room, a towel still covering his wet, messy hair. He had completely changed his formal attire for the usual kind of oversized sweater and very baggy pants he enjoyed wearing as his pajamas.

« Hey, you’re not my Thin mint. » Rockstar playfully announced as he stepped over his amp’s wires. « You’re a marshmallow. »

His lover pulled him into a hug as soon as he got in his reach before kissing him on the lips without holding back. The rocker was a bit surprised by that move but quickly gave in, despite feeling the towel falling off the artist’s head.

« Then it only makes me sweeter. » Mint Choco softly said after they had pulled away, still holding each other closely.

« Heeeey… That’s hella smooth. Where did you learn to flirt like that ? » The guitarist smiled.

« Well, let’s say that… Wait, have you cried ? »

His smirk immediately faded out. How could he know ?!

« N-no. I haven’t. 

-Your eyes are all red, Starlight. You have cried. »

Rockstar damned himself for having overlooked such an obvious detail.

« It’s not that ! It’s because I smoked some pot !

-We both know that you’re not a smoker. Plus, you hate that smell. »

He couldn’t retort anything to that.

« I… Yes, I cried.

-Was it about me ? »

His boyfriend’s pinpointing ability genuinely caught him off guard.

« Yes. Yes, it was about you. »

The way Mint Choco frowned told him that he was sorry. Ashamed, even.

« I…

-It’s because I don’t want you to harm yourself. I’m so scared that you can consider harming yourself. »

His words had shot out without him having any control on them. His sight dropped to the ground, unable to find the bravery to look at him his lover.  
And said lover did the same.

They both stayed there, arms over each other’s shoulders, not saying anything.

« I… Do not wish to harm myself, Rocky. » The violinist finally announced in a shaky voice. « Never did, never will. »

His sentences fell out in another moment of silence.

« Really ? Truly ? » The guitarist asked after a while, his voice reduced to almost a whisper.

« Truly. With all my heart. I… »

He had to take a small breath. Words were once again beginning to struggle to get through his throat.

« I felt like I was just a thing. Unable to think for myself, unable to act for myself. I was so scared that I would be forced to be like that forever. But you… You. You told me all these… Kind things. You reminded me of… Who I am. Of what I am. I was lost in a dark, monochrome world and you suddenly brought me all the colors I needed. You… »

He took some time to breathe again. His voice seemed about to break.

« Tonight, you managed to end years of my fear. »

He buried his head in his lover’s chest, sobbing for what he hoped would be the last time that night. Although this time, it wasn’t sadness or anxiety.  
It was relief and hope.

Rockstar stood there, teary eyed again. His hand slid to the bottom of his boyfriend’s back and he buried his head in his hair.

« I love you so much… »

This single sentence announced with the tiniest of his voice broke him into tears as well. The two of them held that other close to their respective heart, as both of their sorrow formed into a glimmer of hopefulness for their future.

They had no idea how long they had spent crying in each other’s arms. When peace was brought both upon the room and their heart, fatigue rose above all of their other feelings. After everything he had lived, Mint Choco could almost not stand up anymore.

« I am… Exhausted… » He ended up announcing, getting his head slightly away from his lover’s chest.

Rockstar didn’t seem to be ready to let go yet. He kept his face hidden in his boyfriend’s wet hair.

« Starlight, I-. Aah ! »

He was cut off as the guitarist suddenly reached for under his hips and pulled him up bridal style. They stumbled backward as he did so but the rocker managed to gather his footing before actually falling down. When Mint Choco caught a glance at his face, he was smirking, his usual attitude lighting up his tired eyes with a spark.

« May I carry you somwhere ? » The rocker asked him with a falsely snobbish tone.

« Yes. To bed, please. » He answered with a tired filled voice, his face however lit up by a smile.

« Coming right up. »

The musician carried him all the way to the bedroom –which wasn’t as impressive of a feat as one may have thought, considering how small their flat was– and went around the bed to the side Mint Choco usually slept in. Yet there, instead of just lowering him onto the mattress, Rockstar went the extra mile and tried to pull the cover off while still keeping him in his arms, probably wanting to properly tuck him in. His attempt was however quickly cut short as his wobbly left arm suddenly gave up under his boyfriend’s weight and they both crashed down. Mint Choco hopefully landed on the bed –and on Rockstar’s arm– while he was forced into a kneeling position.

« Rockstar ! » The violinist immediately yelled, violently straighening up despite the fact it made the world severely turn around him. « Are… Are you alright ? »

The rocker was rubbing his hurt forearm with his other hand.

« I am. I am. » He ended up answering, getting back on his feet. « Are you ? You didn’t get hurt, I hope ?

-I am okay. » He answered with a gentle smile. « It hurts a bit to land on your arm but I’m okay. »

The violinist massaged the part of his back that had directly fallen onto his boyfriend. Rockstar’s arm did feel incredibly stiff… It was weird.

« I hadn’t realized you’re so muscular. » He let out as his lover was going around to the other side of the bed.

« Hey, my guitar solos ain’t just for esthetic. It’s a real workout to give a show with my red baby. »

Mint Choco smiled softly once again, fiddling with the cover to properly lay down in bed. He sighed in delight as he finally relaxed in that comforting cocoon.

The mattress was basically the only thing in that household that wasn’t of a dirt-cheap quality or bought during an enormous sale. That flat had exclusively been Rockstar’s before they had decided to live together and his boyfriend had never really been rich in his life. The guitarist though hopefully valued his hours of sleep after his concerts and it had taken no effort to convince him to buy a good quality bedding. Not that the violinist actually minded him being kind of a cheapskate. With their quite busy life, the essentials were the main and most important part and they were there.  
He chuckled at the number of time Rockstar had bragged about the four pearls of his life : his almost luxury level of quality mattress, the living room’s comfortable sofa he had grabbed for half of the price in a yard sale, his dear red sugar pearl and of course, the jewel that he himself, Mint Choco, was to his eyes.

Although with the throbbing, awful warmth inside his forehead and his anxiety filled loneliness, it felt cold to lay down with his lover, would he even have laid in the most luxurious of beds.

« Aren’t you coming ? I’m cold… » He whinned, nuzzling the bottom of his face in the sheets.

« Shh… You can sleep, my darling. I’m coming, I’m coming. » The rocker answered, his back turned to him as he was getting rid of this day’s outfit.

« I’m cooold… » He repeated, playfully whimpering.

« Sheesh, where’s your patience gone ? »

The guitarist turned back to him, smiling. He knelt over the bed and laid a soft kiss on his boyfriend’s forehead.

« Just a second, Thin Mint. I’m coming right back.

-Mh mh… »

Mint Choco chuckled silently as Rockstar left the room only wearing his underwear and a fresh sleveless shirt. Seeing how he was carrying his used clothes, he deducted he was probably going to throw them into the washing machine. A faint feeling of guilt arose in his gut as he remembered that he had not cleaned the bathroom at all after his shower but he did his best to ignore it. He was deeply convinced that his boyfriend wasn’t bothered by that at all. Especially tonight.

The guitarist however took his sweet time to come back and Mint Choco soon found himself truly dozing off. He had no idea of the time it was but considering his concert’s program had rarely made him finish before eleven PM, eleven and a half most of the time, he could only imagine it was well past midnight, maybe even one AM. Taking his atrocious state into account, there was truly no wonder why he couldn’t resist anymore.  
But the bed still felt desesperately empty, even with sleep having such a solid grasp on him. A awful coldness that was only more contrastingly scary to the awful burn he was feeling inside his head.

« Hey sugar, your clothes have ar-. Oh, sorry. »

He opened his eyes again, seeing Rockstar enter the bedroom. The guitarist did his best to get into the bed without bothering him too much.

« I… I’m not… shleeping… » He let out, trying his best to focus his fadding consciousness.

« Yup. You sure aren’t. »

He heard a giggle and felt a hand caressing his cheeks as his eyes closed without his consent.

A comforting, familliar warmth surrounded him right after that. He instinctively nuzzled his face against his lover, soon finding a comfortable position to properly sleep.

« Your clothes just arrived, darling. » Rockstar began, whispering while slightly playing with Mint Choco’s hair, his other arm wrapped around him.

« Mh…

-Also, Cocoa called me back earlier. She’s gonna stay with you tomorrow. Alright ?

-Mh mh… »

Everything felt so good right now. The violinist felt like his world had been warmed up again, colored in soothing tones as his lover’s low voice was lulling him to sleep.

He was so happy right now. He wished it would never end.

« Hey, Thin Mint… »

He hadn’t the strength to answer anymore. He just nuzzled in the crook of his boyfriend’s neck.

« Let’s not mess around anymore, okay ? We’ve been living together for years now. We can let each other see our emotions and our problems. Your imperfections and my… My… my emotions. »

Mint Choco chuckled at Rockstar’s lack of words. For someone who was getting known for his text, he sure was bad at it right now.  
But he indeed agreed. He always knew when Rockstar felt bad but the guitarist kept trying to hide it to him. This was midly irritating.  
Yet tonight he had realized he was kind of doing the same. They didn’t hide exactly the same thing but it had ended up in the same way. Crying in each other’s arms.

« Okay… But… I w… ant one thing…

-What is it ? »

The violinist took another instant to focus his drifting attention. He was so sleepy.

« C… all me shin m… int more… » He ended up saying in a sleep filled slur. « I… I like when y… ou do that. »

He heard a chuckle.

« Alright, my little Shin mint.

-N… No… S… Shin… Thin… Mint. »

His words were his last hurdle before unsconsciousness. He had absolutely no strength to open his mouth anymore.  
He heard a shifting in the sheets. Rockstar passed his second arm in the hole that formed the crook of his neck, surrounding him wholly.

« Alright, my little Thin Mint. I’ll do. »

Mint Choco didn’t hear the sentence’s end. He was already asleep, happy and smiling, when the guitarist laid a last kiss on his forehead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here's the end of the ride ! I hope you enjoyed it ! Please don't hesitate to comment, I'd gladly see what you thought of that ! Until next time, bye bye !


End file.
